Hearing: The Key to Improving

Improvement, and being happy with where we currently are, don’t go well together. An attitude of continually striving to maintain and increase our standard is what is needed to succeed. Improvement often comes as a result of an event, called feedback, which more often than not, will not be like music to our ears. How we evaluate, internalise, and act on feedback will, in part, determine whether we go on to succeed, or fail.

Slow!

A couple of months ago, in my first Muay Thai class, one of the instructors was putting my hand wrap on for me. He saw the rakhi, a string, on my right hand. English not being their first language, rather Thai, he gestured and asked what it was. I said it was for protection from my sister. I saw he had a white thread on his hand also. I asked him what it was. He folded his palms and said, “Buddha” and “Temple”. I said thank you after he put the wraps on and continued with the session. He was very warm and a gentleman. Being the first session, another trainer told me I was kicking wrong. He gestured, don’t whip, push, put your hip and back into it. Time and time again, he would repeat the same instructions, and I’d continue to struggle for at least 45 minutes. Toward the end it got marginally better, but then the session ended. In the next session, it was as difficult, he told me I was kicking wrong. I found this experience extremely frustrating. I had previously done karate; and my kicks were the most powerful part of my technique, by far. I didn’t need any special mentoring in kicking during karate, it was just natural, and here I was for at least a couple of sessions, making very little progress in this very area. For some reason, I didn’t like hearing him saying the kicks were wrong. In the next session, the instructor said, “Slow!!!” to try to get me to use less power and focus on technique. My muscles eventually began to become reconditioned to the new technique, which had more push, more of a lean back, more force, and less snap, less whip – which was the karate way that I’d become conditioned to from before. I removed power almost totally, and focussed on technique. The power could always be re-introduced once the technique was right. One day I came in a little early just to watch the other group training. I studied their technique more. After a few sessions, I was with the same instructor, and he was much happier. After training with a number of instructors, and getting various bits of feedback, which were all so useful, I felt better rounded. In a consequent session, whilst one trainer was on the pads, the trainer who tied my wraps in my first lesson was just watching, attentively. After a few minutes, the two trainers spoke to each other for a while, demonstrating techniques and focussing on specifics. They then told me to change a few things. I trusted them completely by now, and listened very carefully. I could also see how doing what they said to do would lead to improvement even before I did it. It was excellent – the more I listened, internalised, and applied, the more effective I was, and visibly so. We started doing some more spontaneous moves a few moments later whilst maintaining the technique, and they signalled very loudly “Good!” The agility in the legs, waist, and back was a lot better in a couple of weeks, and I began to put in 80% of power to good effect. Upper body and legs began to synchronise well, and I expressed my thanks to the instructors. I later came to know that the instructor who tied the wraps for me in my first session, was formerly a champion in his weight in Korea, and had fought in more than 260 fights, almost all of them being victories.

Listening and adapting

There were two instances of feedback in the above example; the first being in the first few weeks regarding how the kicks were wrong, and the latter being after some sessions from the two trainers. The attitude during the first was one of cloudedness and previous baggage, which creates layers between what is coming in, and you, who should be listening and applying. These layers are the talk of the mind, and can be severely detrimental in us picking up these gems of feedback and really improving. The layers are usually down to a sense of ego saying, I am right in what am doing, don’t try to tell me what to do, or how to do it. In the second instance of feedback however, there was acceptance of the trainers, trust in the trainers, a real desire to improve, and ultimately an openness to change the way I was doing things recognising that it was not right. The mind was clear, and there was very little between the words coming out of their mouth, and me incorporating these. The mind is the medium which can either position us to improve, or to continue and be ignorant to good advice. In the Bhagawad Gita, the ancient Indian scripture recited by Lord Krishna to Arjuna, essentially to prepare him for war, Lord Krishna says that the mind can be one’s worst enemy, or best of friends. How clear it is that this was the case for the Muay Thai technique, and it doesn’t take much to translate this example into the corporate context, or indeed the personal life context either. We need to be open to feedback about us, to accept that we may need to change. However, we must be careful what feedback we take on. The source of feedback must be authoritative, or well positioned at a minimum. It is ever so important to be able to trust the source of feedback, especially in an environment where others may be rewarded at your expense. So we must be bold, open to change, and yet careful when trying to learn how we can improve in our paths to success.