Genuine Openness: Perception & Selectiveness

Perception

Life is a funny process. Another year ends, and another begins. The only thing we have guaranteed to take with us is more experience. What is the quality of our experiences? What have they bought to us? It's important we are clear on what biases shape our psyche so that we are genuinely receptive to the arrangements in the world and our lives in a manner that is independent-minded and true to who we are. With more knowledge doesn’t necessarily come happiness. Yesterday morning I went to a bar to watch a mixed martial arts event, UFC 219. Being New Years Eve, there was practically no one there, but there was a festive atmosphere. I asked the bar lady whether they were showing the event. She asked for detail and I explained. She said in her mid-western accent, “Sure we can play it, but there’s gonna be no sound cos there’s gonna be kiddies comin' soon.” A few hours in, and a lady came in dressed as a clown, red lipstick covering almost the entire width of her face, a multi-coloured skirt and a baggy top. It was just me and her at the bar. Having forgotten about the kids party, I was initially thinking it could be someone with an odd taste, perhaps not all quite up there in the head. I then realised the kids might be having a party, and that it’s probably the clown for the party. We had some odd exchanges; I initially gave her a concerned look, and she gave me quite a straight look in return. In the facial exchange it was almost an exchange being responded to with a confirmation that she was there for a job. She spent a good half hour blowing up and tying balloons into different shapes. As it approached noon, many parents began to come in with their kids. After sitting down and ordering their food, some of the kids would individually approach the clown and she would give them a small gift. The way they approached was a stark contrast to how they behaved at their table with their parents. On the table they made noise, and were comfortable and familiar. When they approached the clown, they were shy, a little hesitant, but had an air of excited nervousness, which created a sense of anticipation on how the clown would react to them. Feeling very happy, they went back to their table and with great excitement and explained to their parents what they had received. My observing the clown before any kids were present; she understood I was there to watch the event on the big screen, and I knew she was there doing her job as a clown. Both as human beings getting on with activities which we both understood, there was a level of transparency. This comes about as we grow up and learn about things one tends to do in life i.e. work to sustain oneself.  For the kids however, the equation was totally different. They have a concept of a clown, not that it’s a human being who puts some face paint on, some different dress, and presents themselves as a clown. They just see a clown, and this is what they saw. There was a huge difference in my reaction, interaction, and what I got out of the clown verses what the children got from the clown. For them, it made almost a magical experience, for me the clown was just a distraction.

Selectiveness

As a kid in the UK, pre-Christmas holidays were some of the best times. I recall waiting for the TV guide when newspapers and magazines would publish what would be on TV, and the Christmas Eve, Day and New Years Eve and Day would have amazing films on, which coupled with food, family and games would make for an incredible time. The anticipation factor in this was huge. Seeing which films were on, following the football games over the period, and finally the anti-climax of going back to school. Films are now on tab online, as is almost any commodity. The interactional element cannot be commoditised, but our mentalities can drift that way. Getting a football shirt when at school as a gift, then showing it to everyone at school was a big deal. When we are older we can have all of those things, however the bliss perhaps isn’t the same as a kid receiving them. Faith and knowledge have an interesting relationship. The magic of Christmas, takes faith to believe in it. In the same way I dissected the clown in my head, if we dissect Christmas using logic, according to the way we celebrate, there isn’t much of a link. Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Christ, who was effectively from the Middle-East, and by no stretch of our imagination anything to do with the West. In fact, Jesus was geographically closer to Africa and India than he is to the West. So why not represent Jesus in this way as a clearly having Middle Eastern origin? Why the Santa Clause? Reindeer, and so many other things? This is selectiveness. I enjoy the Christmas spirit as much as the next person does, but it’s things we create in our heads and put faith in, and therefore feel a certain way about Christmas. A few weeks ago, there was a documentary about a baby elephant stuck in a hole in India. The person taking the video went very close to the elephant to the point you would very clearly see the elephants eyes, mouth, tongue and trunk in great detail. We are typically used to seeing elephants from afar, however seeing it from close gives much more realisation of how real a creature it is. The sound of an elephant is over 100 decibels, which is as loud as a jet flying 1,000 feet in the sky and they weigh up to 7 tonnes.  I guess this is what the term “up close and personal” also relates to. The elephant was so real, but yet so unbelievable as a species. If we had no idea that such a thing as an elephant exists, and someone purely gave a description, I have little doubt many people would easily dismiss it. 

Though technology and society are moving with pace, even to the extent they are fast changing human psychology, habits and motivations, there is a “naturalness” to connecting with existence and embracing that there are many things we simply cannot understand through our limited perceptions and misplaced faith in things. There is a sense of open mindedness that comes with mentally being aligned with natures many manifestations and learning to live our lives in a way that has a greater sense of harmony with these. This way we will experience the bliss of a child rather than distraction of an adult.

The mind is the instrument for feeling different material experiences, but intelligence is deliberative and can change everything for the better. The intelligent person therefore can attain salvation from the illusion of material existence by proper use of intelligence. The Vedas

What is your Reality?

On the ferry back from work, I overheard some people saying “it’s going to smash into the dock!” and so I had a quick glance to where the ferry was going. Usually the ferry goes a little far away from the parallel dock, and then with a hovering like motion, moves closer to the docking station. This time, it seemed for whatever reason the captain went for a close docking without needing the hovering to get closer. As a consequence, there was more of a risk it could smash head on with the docking station, which obviously caught the passengers’ attention. Once these people announced that the ferry could smash into the dock, people became rapt in attention on the path of the ferry. At the same time, I saw a hawk hovering above the surface of the water eyeing its prey. It made two or three rounds, with an attempted dive talons first also. Two simultaneous realities. For the hawk, it had the least concern about the ferry docking, and for the ferry docking, the passengers had the least concern about the hawk.

Last week, Hong Kong, Macau, and parts of mainland China were hit by Typhoon Hato, the highest level typhoon in the last 10 years to hit Hong Kong. In the midst of this typhoon, more attention was turned to this, by more of the population, be it man, bird or animal. It had a more all-pervasive affect. Taking precedence over all of the physical realities, all docking stopped – ferries were all firmly at their docking stations, not being allowed to move either by rules or the sheer physical impossibility of a ferry functioning in the water. I didn’t see many birds hovering in the water during the peaks of the typhoon.

This weekend is the big fight between Conor McGregor, one of the best mixed martial artists in the world, against Floyd Mayweather, who has dominated boxing for the last decade with an undefeated record after fighting a host of powerful opponents. For McGregor, his reality has been to deal with a plethora of attacks. In his last interview, he emphasised that there are many ways to attack the human body, and how in mixed martial arts we respect all of these styles. For Floyd Mayweather, attack using the fists, with a certain rule set not allowing clinches or use of other limbs has been his reality for decades. Joe Rogan, the famous martial arts commentator and standup comedian once made an interesting comparison, saying that martial arts trumps all sports. This is because if during a basketball match if things heat up or there’s a dispute, people come to blows; which acknowledges the reality that physical defeat is more of a reality than playing a sport.

In this way we see that in so many fields there are so many realities that consume the minds of those involved in them. False ego in one sense means to believe that our reality and what we do and how we are is the absolute reality and that the lives of others are less significant or important. The reality is that there are all of these realities co-existing, and more than we can ever imagine. Some may be more pervasive than others at different stages of our lives. The Srimad Bhagawatam, the ancient Indian teachings say that “In the relative world the knower is different from the known, but in the Absolute Truth both the knower and the known are one and the same thing.” This view is extremely broad and views the oneness or commonness in all. If we can keep even this point in mind, then our sense of perspective will always be better, whether in the workplace or at home. When we aim to encompass in our understanding all of these truths, we will have a more comprehensive and less ego and self-centred perspective of reality.

Life’s desires should never be directed toward sense gratification. One should desire only a healthy life, or self-preservation, since a human being is meant for inquiry about the Absolute Truth. Nothing else should be the goal of one’s works. Srimad Bhagwatam 1.2.10

The conception of God and the conception of Absolute Truth are not on the same level. The Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam hits on the target of the Absolute Truth. The conception of God indicates the controller, whereas the conception of the Absolute Truth indicates the summum bonum or the ultimate source of all energies. Opening words of Srimad Bhagwatam Introduction, AC Bhaktivedanta Prabhupada

Wars on Terror: The Debated Battlegrounds

As we offered a minutes silence to the victims of the Manchester terror attack this week in the Hong Kong Stadium, I couldn’t help but reflect on the dynamics and continual societal tussles in the world and the kinds of things that drive them.

Manipulation

 If you have ever experienced someone or groups of people try to manipulate you, whether it is in terms of your activities, your personal use of time, and most importantly your emotional focus, you will know it is something that can cause damage. The most unfortunate thing is that it originates with an individual’s insecurity and desire to see their stocks rise in the world whether that be in terms of social standing, financially, or even in a physical sense. It is sometimes said that ‘religion’ was conjured up and instituted to control masses of people. Manipulation tends to be conducted by individuals; we see it with so many examples of dictators. As the number of people one controls increases, the reward gets bigger since it gets noticed more.

 

The Middle East

Most people in the West have never been to the Middle Eastern countries where there is regular turmoil; not many would dare. They’re not the most prosperous; they’ve been subject to many underground militia regimes that are extremely dangerous, with agendas we cannot imagine. Their concept and lack of value of life is one that an average person in the West cannot imagine.  I once recall a conversation with a Japanese neighbour, who told me that most average people just want to have a family, have children and live a happy life. This is non-different in the Middle-East. So we always have those who want power through various means, and those who just want a peaceful life. Imagine a swimming pool with a shark who is hungry, and throw in some fish who just want to raise a family and be happy. Even one shark, will cause turmoil for the fish at certain times. This is nature also. The difference, according to certain religion is that humans have the capacity to think deeper before acting on our instinct to eat, kill, etc. The less primitive the civilisation or society, the less thought they give to consequences or morality of action including the value of life, before acting; and hence the closer they are to reflecting animal tendencies.

Polished interventionism

With the red carpets and accumulated formalisms of western politics, there are people with motives that may not be so considerate of the wellbeing of everyone, although it may appear that this is their concern. Motives can arise from personal ambition to leave a mark on hordes of people, to make a difference, that can be attributed ultimately to themselves. When the desire for this supersedes compassion for ordinary people, it can be destructive. The difference between this and the Middle Eastern behaviours is  the polish and glamour. Trails of destruction are hidden because of the sophistication and ability to manoeuvre, a veil is lifted and put down by choice on masses of people. Self-preservation and benefit is the name of the game.

Confluence

When the two above meet, the value of life, is far lower than the desire to win, exact revenge, and the plethora of other ego-driven motivations driven by ignorance on both sides. The result is death, and lots of it. It is like a stampede ruining so much effort, loving experiences and exchanges of individuals, dreams of betterment and happiness of the common people. The scary thing is, these impure desires such as anger, desire to control, and greed leading to such devastating actions, exist in most of us; it’s just that we act on them to varying levels at different times in our lives. In this way, the battlefields are really our hearts, and this is where the work needs to be done. 

 

Following such conclusions, the demoniac, who are lost to themselves and who have no intelligence, engage in unbeneficial, horrible works meant to destroy the world.

Bhagavad Gita 16.9

Seeing

 On a Saturday afternoon on Canton Road, Hong Kong, it’s not uncommon to see queues of luxury brand enthusiast outside of the store all day long in order to get exposure to the latest designs. There have been instances of shoppers asking for “one of everything”, in a Louis Vuitton store, such is their wealth. One Saturday, I was on my way back from training with a huge rucksack, scruffy trousers, and a wool hat; I went into a high end boutique hotel wanting to use the gents, as you sometimes do! “Excuse me Sir, what would you like?” Clearly not interested in actually helping me find an item, but rather question what am doing in the hotel. “Just want to use the toilet if that’s ok?” “They are for customers only, sorry.” Another evening, on returning from a client meeting, with a suit and tie, with a pair of brown shoes, freshly shaven, I walk into the same hotel lobby before getting home. “Welcome Sir.” “Can I use the gents please?” “Certainly, right over there Sir.”

 

We were at an evening seminar on technology and regulation, and how the authorities and entrepreneurs in the two fields are working together to move forward. At the end, people crowded around the speakers to talk to them. Most people were in suits and ties, with another large portion in business casual, and one slightly elderly man in a yoga style t-shirt, with an Om on it, wire-like hair. I watched as people were looking at him and dismissing him as not worthy of talking to, he was on his own for a good while, before introducing himself to me proactively. Later, when talking to a person who knew him, he said he was one of the first to be highly successful in the start up scene decades ago and was just here giving advice to people. Once a few people got to know this, he gathered quite an audience.

 

The attendant at the boutique hotel, scanning people who enter, was just working there doing his job, and based on information he has through his and others’ past experience, trust patterns, stereo types, etc; they decide how to act with individuals and groups. This is very much understandable, and it is what we sometimes call “human nature” when people have their roles and needs. In a similar way at the seminar, people want to talk to people who would be of “value” to them, worth their time, and therefore people differentiate between ranks, net worth, success, and find the people that suit their needs. This is again “natural” given the environment and macro-drivers.

Taking time out often gives a different perspective of “value.” What is success? What drives my judgements of what will contribute to my success? What contributes to my behaviour? When a child sees a mother, or a dear one, it is often driven by love. Of course, it may be driven by needs such as wanting something, but often times it is driven by love. Whether the mother is rich, or poor, the child will love the mother naturally. It will happen in the war torn areas of the Middle-East, and in the wealth filled areas of the “upper classes” of the most developed cities. When we are constantly bombarded with definitions of success by the macro-structures, and give ourselves little time to get away; our judgements will use more so-called intelligence, and less heart. The more we get time to contemplate, see different perspectives and people, the more we will lean towards seeing with the heart. Intelligence will be used to understand the macro-structures, interact with them appropriately, but ultimately use heart to govern our interactions. This doesn’t equate to being soft and fluffy with everyone; it means to respect the multitude of qualities in others, the ultimate oneness of us at a deeper level, and be real human beings.

 The humble sage, by virtue of true knowledge, sees with equal vision a learned and gentle brahmana, a cow, an elephant, a dog and a dog-eater.

Krishna to Arjuna, Bhagavad Gita

 

“I speak to everyone in the same way, whether he is the garbage man or the president of the university.”

Albert Einstein

The Good, The Bad & the Ugly: How Our Motivation Matters

The role of intent

What is the difference between murder and man-slaughter? Intent. Only intent. How we prove intent is one of the biggest topics in court and leads to hundreds of thousands of man/hours worth of work and millions of dollars worth of legal fees. I recall watching the live OJ Simpson trial when he was accused of double murder of his then wife Nicole Brown Simpson, and waiter Ron Goldman. The OJ Simpson documentary OJ: Made In America’ Oscar-Winning Documentary shows how there are often times multiple external facts, multiple actors in the situation, but what the concern is around, is the one single motivation.  

 

We choose our principles, often very early in life

Being asked about corporate values earlier this week, and specifically which ones stood out most and mattered most, it’s not a topic many people spend much time dwelling on earlier in their careers especially, and understandably so since there are many other motivations that may take priority i.e. reward, technical content, nature of work, etc. In terms of values; each individual will have their own values, since almost birth and ways of behaving and operating. If these coincide or overlap with corporate values, it’s just a happy coincidence, but it’s not easy to one day dream up a set of values and force people to change to imbibe these; whatever the company or context may be.

 

Certain "values" are needed for any type of success; these aren't a big deal

The response to which values are most important, can only partially be answered. There are values that are secondary, and values that are primary. Primary values are the most important; do you really care about others? Do you want what is best for others? Are you thinking selfishly or selflessly? Secondary values are things like “teaming”, “thinking innovatively” etc. These, even people who don’t have good motivations, can do. Hitler teamed, Hitler thought innovatively. Never believe that seeing certain values implies a good deeper motive. Secondary values aren’t something to be so proud of, in isolation; they can be calculatingly attained, for manipulative and ulterior purposes. To be "successful", such values are used in execution 9 times out of 10. There can be people who externally may not appear successful, but they have the core values right; this is what matters in the grand scheme, and not how much of a balance a person may have notched up. It's easy to see when this is the case; the emphasis will be on how we can all achieve our potential in our own ways according to our own nature and abilities, rather than how I can be successful at the expense of others.

 

I’ve been fortunate to have had leaders and mentors in various fields, who have set wonderful examples with their values, and also those who really haven’t. As time goes by, and we define what governs the way we choose to operate and the type of people we prefer to surround ourselves with in order to grow, it’s always nice to compare and contrast approaches, and really understand what we value and aspire to imbibe.

 

Whatever our situation, greatness is having a simple heart. Radhanath Swami